So, I had this thought the other day. So many people, including myself, seem to assume that homebirth midwives are "protecting" birth and women. But, I am coming to realize more and more that birth survives and happens many times IN SPITE of some midwives. I never thought I would say this, but that is where I am at right now. I keep hearing of more and more stories where the midwife (in a homebirth, btw), is yelling "PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!", telling the woman where, when and how to push, and generally NOT respecting women's intution. It is almost as if there are some midwives who just give lip service to trusting birth, and deep down, they still feel the need to control birth.
I am not midwife bashing. I love midwifery. I am a student midwife myself. I am just seeing more and more exactly what kind of midwife I want to be, and realizing more and more that there are many more differences between midwifes other than CPM, CNM, DEM, etc, etc..... Thank goddess that I had P. at my birth. She is the kind of midwife that I aspire to be. She truly understands what birth is and can be if left alone. I pray for guidance as I walk down my path to midwifery to keep my heart open and to be honest with myself and confront my fears head on.